A Beach, A Cast, And A Wierd Situation
by Elston87
Summary: Siegfried is in search of a specific person, but can't seem to get closer without encountering a whole bunch of distractions! Just what will happen next? Rated T for language and later chapters.  *Chapter 4 Completed*
1. Chapter 1

Soul Calibur and all related things of the series (characters and such) belong to Namco, not me.

A/N: W00t, my first ever written fanfic, from both me and the series. I hope my mind plays out well for the time being. I hope all of you readers enjoy this first long chapter.

-Elston87

"**A Beach, A Cast, And A Weird Situation."**

**Chapter One**

Yellow Sands Beach, a perfect place for a refreshing getaway. It was an absolutely perfect day for the beach, with the crisp sunlight, a barely noticeable breeze, and lukewarm water, all under one landscape. The sound of flocking seagulls, roaring tidewaters, and fresh air were all present, as if acting like the conditions were played out from a weatherman's journal. Although for such a place for leisure and relaxation, rarely anyone would show up here on the weekends, regardless on what the conditions were. Though awkward, anyone who travels here will earn a well spent day off, as said by many of the past visitors.

Off the shoreline, a German swordsman was strolling about the mainland, rapidly pacing back and fourth near a wooden pavilion. Siegfried Schtauffen was wondering about, thinking to himself about an unseemly subject. "Where is she? She should have arrived here about now. If I only had a watch," the German swordsman says to himself, placing his long sword on a nearby wooden bench with the handle facing up, and the blade piercing the sand. Full with aggravation, Siegfried takes a seat on the long wooden bench, next to his sword, slightly groaning about the current situation. After giving out a long, deep sigh, Siegfried starts to think to himself again, covering his eyes with his hands to block out his vision. After two minutes of stillness, a sound was heard not far away, like large footsteps planting against the sand. From his current position, Siegfried was alerted by the sound, raising his head to check the area, but no one gives sight to his eyes.

Returning to his "deep thinking position", Siegfried's mind starts wondering again, and not too soon after that, the same sound was heard, except even closer this time. Quickly standing up, Siegfried quickly rotates his vision to catch sight of anyone nearby. "Who goes there?" the knight says, drawing his sword from the handle, and briefly looking around. Lowering the weapon, Siegfried approaches the wooden pavilion, where the source of the sound was heard from his point of view. Slowly checking every corner of his eyesight, Siegfried inspects the four corners of the structure, with nothing in sight. Feeling uncertain, he stands in the center of the pavilion, slowly examining the four corners again, with nothing but sand and seagulls in view. Suddenly, Siegfried finds a fist in front of his vision, appearing from his rear. Quickly turning around and drawing his weapon, a samurai backs down his guard, saying "Whoa. Scared a bit, Siegfried?" he questions. "Mitsurugi? What are you doing here on the beach?" Siegfried says, still with his weapon at hand. "Same question to you, my friend. What brings you here?" asks the samurai. Lowering his weapon, the German knight paces slowly towards Mitsurugi's view. "I am looking for someone. Yet, I have not seen her, when she should have showed up under this wooden pavilion not even five minutes ago," Siegfried explains. "How about you take a seat, and I'll explain everything." the German knight finally says, approaching the bench, with the samurai following suit.

"First off, a she?" Mitsurugi says. "Well, it seems like you got the hook-up upon someone, eh Sieg?" the samurai questions, while laughing to himself. "Funny, as you may find yourself," the German knight says, "but, uh... It's a very serious manner, and it must be discussed with this lady". Siegfried tries to hide his guilt, but an gland of sweat from his forehead gives it away very easily. "Who might this 'someone' be exactly?" the samurai asks, raising a brow. Siegfried tries to waste no time covering up who 'she' is. "Uh, let's just say that it's a bit of a personal matter to myself, no?" he says. Mitsurugi raises himself from the bench. "So, what was the point of you dragging me into this conversation if your not going to 'explain everything' then? Huh?" the samurai exclaims as he circles the bench. "Uh, man. I just don't want to admit it. I cannot trust you," the knight says, getting up from his seat, looking away from the samurai at the ocean water. "You cannot trust me, you say? Hah! What a damned excuse that was!" Mitsurugi was starting to grow impatient, then began tapping his foot on the sand. "Fine then. But first, explain to me why you are at this beach first," Siegfried says. "If you must know then, I mind as well explain to you," Mitsurugi says, and begins his story.


	2. Chapter 2

Soul Calibur and all related things of the series (characters and such) belong to Namco, not me.

A/N: Chapter Two in this fanfic now, and already I've had a writer's block like forever in the past couple of days, but hopefully this chapter will still be enjoyable to all readers. I am still trying to get the hang of OpenOffice, but I can suffice without MS Office 2007. Some new characters make the scene, and vengeance for _what exactly!_ Don't wanna give the whole plot away, so you can find out for yourself.

-Elston87

"**A Beach, A Cast, And A Weird Situation."**

**Chapter Two**

The samurai, Mitsurugi, rose from his seat and drew his weapon, pointing the fine tip of the blade towards the sky, sparkling at will. "That little cheap shot, **that** was unforgivable," the samurai exclaimed as he stared far off into the crystal clear waters. "It all started as a _little game_ of hide-and-seek, usually with me hiding and _her_ seeking. Yet it was somehow very humorous to her how she found me in places that she would never check in a thousand years, yet she still discovers my location, no matter where I head off into. Yet, I always successfully fend off her attacks, yet it turns into an evened out stalemate for the both of us. If she weren't so quick, boy I would-" "Who exactly are you talking about in this manner?" Siegfried interrupted, curious to know who _she_ was. "Well, aren't we skipping out today, eh Sieg? Heh," says Mitsurugi as he stomps his foot on the sand, regretting the memory of the "little" loss.

A clanging noise was heard from underneath the golden sand where the samurai had planted his foot. With repetition, Mitsurugi stomped at least two more times with a surprised expression that struck on his face. The clanging noise was heard yet again, like a handle banging a glass dresser. "Did you hear that?" says the samurai, planting his foot yet again to hear the sound. It was, obviously, heard again, but this time Siegfried actually noticed it for the first time. "Yeah, I sure did," says the German knight. "It sounds like a glass or bronze container, with something possibly fragile inside of it. Shall we excavate?" he questions. "Huh. Sure will." the samurai goes off, and changes his facial expression to one of a serious look. Lifting up his heel, he started to scoop away at the sand with his foot, dragging away tremendous amount of grains at the minute. Siegfried decides to join in, and uses his long sword like a metal shovel, carrying huge quantities of sand on the blade and lifting it away. After a minute of excavation, Mitsurugi stuck a crossed face. "Huh! How deep is this thing?" the samurai questions, getting furious with his pace by the second. Finally, an impact was heard, as the two men had seen part of the "container". With their arms, they lifted out a portion of the object from the sand, exposing it's wooden exterior, along with an old and rusty bronze finish to accommodate it. "Looks like a vintage chest," Seigfried said, as he observed the container.

Finally extracting the container from its grounded location, indeed it was a buried chest. From the looks of it, its wooden construction was worn out, and chipped away like a termite's dinner. It's bronze finish was rusty, jagged, and had definitely lost its shine. A bronze lock was placed at the front of the chest. Like a coincidence, Siegfried took a glance at the hole that they had dug up, and managed to find a key that was made of the same material as the lock. "Well, would you look at that!" he exclaimed, holding the key up into the samurai's view. "I dunno. Something is quite strange about this find," says Mitsurugi. "It just seems too obvious. I mean, who just leaves the key to a chest like that? They got to me fools of themselves if this was sacred treasure!" The samurai takes the key, and inserts it into the lock, taking quite some force to push it in tight and solid. Twisting the key clockwise, the lock breaks open, falling off of the slanted hook on the front door flap that was holding it in place. Excited, the two gaze at the unlocked chest, with pondering thoughts of its contents. Mitsurugi started to slowly open the front flap, about to reveal what was inside their find. Suddenly,

**TWHACK!**

Mitsurugi had been stuck in the back of the head, sending himself head first inside the chest, with the front flap closing on him with a loud thud. Dazed and confused, Siegfried quickly looks to his left to see who had done the deadly blow. "Ha ha ha, that was amusing!" a female figure had said, crossing her arms. "Identify yourself!" said the German knight, clinching his fists together, due to no time he had to draw his weapon, nor even think about it. "What a shame. Do you think I am going to reveal my identity _that easily_?" exclaimed the girl, with a furious, but feminine tone. Opening the flap of the chest, the samurai had turned around to catch sight of whom had struck him out. "You... **Yet another cheap attack from you! This is absolute nonsense!"** exclaimed Mitsurugi, clinching his fists with potential force. "You think you two can brawl me to death? Then we shall see such bravery!" yelps the female, drawing a small sword. Preparing for combat, the two men stick together, ready to duel the mystery woman.

_See the epic but hilarious outcome in Chapter Three! I need better closing notes..._


	3. Chapter 3

Soul Calibur and all related things of the series (characters and such) belong to Namco, not me.

A/N: Things have been busy lately around the house, and I really wanted to get Chapter 3 up before my ideabox disappeared. This is where some humor of the story comes to play, and the rating may be subject to change because of future ideas. I now space lines between character dialogue for easier reading, and not all crowded like the previous chapters. Hope you all enjoy!

-Elston87

**A Beach, A Cast, And A Weird Situation."**

**Chapter Three**

Forgetting about the contents of the chest, in which were probably damaged pretty good by now, Mitsurugi had recovered from the fatal blow from the mystery woman. Because drawing his weapon would take time, he clenches his fists and prepares for melee combat, as in the same manner that that the German knight, Siegfried, had done previously. Glancing at the mystery woman, the samurai immediately recognizes whom she is.

"**ARRRGGGHHHH! That will be your last time you will ever stealth attack me you sneaky fiend! This ends today, Taki!"** the samurai screams at the girl. Blushing at the fact that her identity had been revealed to Mitsurugi's partner, Taki does let her guard down.

"Well then. Now that I have found you in your last hiding place you'll ever visit," the girl replies, "Do you want to engage in that passionate make-out session now?" she finally questions the samurai.

"**Wha- wha- wht- wh- WHAT!" **a confused Mitsurugi yelps, completely stunned by the question. Siegfried became dumbfounded in less than a second, dropping his jaw to an extendable measure.

"An answer is completley out of the question," Taki replies, kicking Mitsurugi softly to the ground and then throwing her swords at him, nearly missing his arms to keep him pinned down from getting up. She then jumped on the samurai and began her "session". Siegfried was at such a loss for words as he unintentionally watched her caress the samurai's face with soft and tender kisses to his forehead, cheeks, and lips as he struggled to release himself from her hold. Quickly looking around to find something else to wonder about, Siegfried spotted a figure in the distance, with a long black pole planted in the sand that was also visible. Mitsurugi slowly held out a hand in the direction to Siegfried, as the knight set foot in the direction of his object of interest, but Taki slowly placed it back on the sand. The samurai felt hopeless with a sad frown, as Siegfried was quickly lost from his sight.

"_Damn. I guess I will have to endure this torture for as long as Hell can stretch",_ he thought, as he slowly closed his eyes, while Taki continued to "do her thing". Not long before that, Siegfried was far away from grasp.

Siegfried had arrived at the location of the long black pole, only to find a figure with a triangular straw hat watching a monochrome television set on an old comforter, which was surprisingly still intact for its age. The long black pole was actually an extremely high antenna to extend the signal reach of the figure's television set. The man was dressed in solid khaki yellow pants with a blue collar button shirt, in which was unbuttoned, probably because of the hot temperature. Siegfried actually stood behind the man, crossed his arms, and began to watch the TV for a short period of time before he spoke to him.

"Uhhh... Umm. Uh... Hello there?" Siegfried had nervously questioned the figure. The man had lifted up his left wrist and said, "Television."

"Yeah, uh, GREAT! Um, can... I... help you, s-s-sir?" he questioned him again. The figure had turned down the volume control for the television set and rose from his seat to face Siegfried. Tipping up the edge of his straw hat, and exposing his face, the man said, "Li Long," presenting a hand for the German knight to shake. Taking the hand and acknowledging his name, "Siegfried," the knight replied to him, as they shook hands.

"To where do you come from?" questions Li Long. "Eh... Ex- Excuse me?" Siegfried replied, intentionally stalling to give himself more time to think about the man's question. "To where do you come from," Li Long questions again in a deeper tone. "I.. um.. uh... from over there by those 'two'," Siegfried replies again, pointing his right hand to the location of the samurai and the ninja.

"Ah, I see," says Li Long, fixing his hat to get a better view of the two figures from the distance. "Whom are they?"

"Ah... what?" Siegfried stumbles again as he was slipped off guard by the man's second question. "Oh, you mean those two?" he says, as Li Long nods his head to him in correct correspondence. "Ah. They are the female ninja Taki, and the samurai Mitsurugi," he says, answering what he had hoped to be the man's last question.

Li Long suddenly sharpened his eyes as he heard the pronunciation of the samurai's name. He slowly walked over to the television set and drew his weapon, in which was a pair of nunchucks, spun around in a counterclockwise motion, and lashed the weapon at the television, instantly shattering the screen into tiny shards and charring the casing. It was obliterated in a flash to Siegfried's eyes.

"**How dare 'he' come forth to the beach, as vacationing had just begun for myself!"** Li Long had violently shouted. **"He shall come forth to me and fight, or he shall feel the wraith of the Dragon's Breath!"** he spoke again, while violently swinging his nunchucks in circular and swiveled motions. This demonstrated to Siegfried that he was a skilled combatant with the weapon.

"Um, uh, I am afraid you cannot do that," Siegfried had said to him, but Li Long had started walking in the direction of the two, ignoring Siegfried's statement. "And, uh, I think you won't be able to fix this," he also said, scratching his head at the jumbled mess of the television set. Walking on, Li Long had stepped up his pace, and continued to trudge toward the samurai, leaving Siegfried to catch up.

End A/N: Awkward chapter, huh? You probably didn't expect Taki to do such a thing, not to mention Li Long make an appearance. I have yet to go before this story can reach hilarious potential. Anyway, I hope you all enjoyed this chapter, and stay tuned for the next chapter, in which the epic fight scene between Li Long and Mitsurugi breaks out, or will it?

-Elston87


	4. Chapter 4

Soul Calibur and all related things of the series (characters and such) belong to Namco, not me.

A/N: Ever since school went out, I now have a summer job, which will now make it harder to update chapters in between shifts. But, I will try out this mobile service to see how that works. I wrote this out of writer's block, but nonetheless, you shall (or shall not) enjoy it! It's a long one.

-Elston87

**A Beach, A Cast, And A Weird Situation."**

**Chapter Four**

Li Long was approaching the two figures in the distance, with Siegfried trailing him. Siegfried tried to keep his pace up with the Chinese warrior, but his armor was starting to drag him down from intense running. Li Long was starting to gain ahead of him, as he was starting to slightly jog.

"**Hey! Wh... Wha... WAAIITT UP!"** the German knight yelped, nearly out of breath and shortly after that statement, he collapsed to the sand. But, he quickly recovered and still persisted to catch up with Li Long, as he knew that embarrassment to the samurai or a brutal beating to him was coming if he didn't persuade Li Long to cancel his 'assault'. Shortly, Siegfried realized that he and Li Long were now at a considerable distance from each other, collapsing to the sand yet again, gazing forward and wondering what the fate of the samurai determines to be.

"Damn..." Siegfried managed to slip out of his mouth, nearly out of breath. "I hope that psycho chick decides to leave him soon, because something like that 'weird situation' is bombed to blow off the guard of an individual like him. I know I would be," Siegfried continued under his breath, clenching the sand in an attempt to recover from his kneeling position. Dropping his chest to the ground, he watched ahead as Li Long made visual contact to the two as he tried to catch his breath and rest to regain energy. Siegfried only could think of the worst.

Li Long had finally caught up with Mitsurugi, in whom was still being 'grounded' by the Japanese ninja, Taki. Completely ignoring the situation, Li Long drew his weapon in a flash and spoke.

"**Mitsurugi!"** the Chinese warrior shouted. This drew the attention of the samurai, as he peeked his head to the side of the girl quickly to see whom it was. Mustering up the proper strength, Mitsurugi freed his foot and planted it on Taki, swiftly pushing her aside. Recovering from being grounded for a long time, he struggles to stand up and face his opposition. Surprised at his sight, he drew his weapon and replied to him.

"You! What the hell could you be doing here!" the samurai shouts back, clenching his two handed sword, ready to strike. He took a brief moment to smear off some of the kiss marks that Taki had plastered all over his face. Positioning one end of his nunchucks under his armpit, Li Long draws an imposing stance to the samurai.

"You and I need to 'settle' something," he said in a dark tone. "You have always had your excuses to exit the battlegrounds, but not this time! Oh, no no no, not on my watch! This 'time' will be the 'time' that you will face defeat! Be prepared to be deep fried by the **Dragon's Beath**!" he finally closed his statements. Dazed and confused by the words of Li Long, Mitsurugi struggled to keep a steady fighting stance with his blade, with the fine tip scraping the air like a ballistic missile.

"Ehh. Not today baskethead," he replied to Li Long. "But, if indeed you do insist to fight me, then I can't ignore such a feisty challenger!" Mitsurugi replied again, but with a much bolder tone. He finally gained control of his sword and properly stanced himself, ready for combat. Taki, glancing back and forth at the two, realized that Mitsurugi was pitting himself in danger, and for some awkward reason, she did not want Mitsurugi to fight, as she was not done with her 'session' just yet. She had to think quickly on how to react, but Mitsurugi and Li Long already started to battle, with herself backing away and watching in shock as the two fought.

Mitsurugi and Li Long exchanged attacks from every direction, commencing their enduring fight. Mitsurugi waved his blade in circles, performing three vertical slashes, but Li long blocked with ease. Li Long then 'danced' with his nunchucks again, attempting to strike the samurai both vertically and horizontally, managing to successfully strike the samurai once in the chest. Quickly recovering from the the chest blow, Mitsurugi then used a series of kicks to keep his opponent in check, but Li Long managed to grab his right foot, lash him in the face, and then twirled his leg, sending the samurai plopping the the ground face first. Li Long then retreated back a couple of steps, still in his fighting stance, while Mitsurugi recovered again. Taki became worried, as she feared that he was going to loose the fight. Siegfried, after a long rest, was not far from the two combatants, running towards them.

"**Hey! You two stop this right now!"** he screamed as he tried to communicate with the two fighters, but they ignored his loud shout, and Siegfried fell to the ground again, tripping on a rock. **"AHHH, rotten mutant nipples!"** he screamed again, making a pun for some sake of humor in himself.

The two combatants continued their grueling battle, with Li Long 'in the lead'. He violently lashed his nunchucks at the samurai, striking the chest that was discovered by the samurai and the German knight.

"**Fishgills! He broke the chest!" **Siegfried screamed, witnessing the chest breaking into bronze shrapnel and wooden bits. This comment managed to draw the attention of the two fighters, with the samurai facing the broken chest.

"You! I told you not to follow my trail!" Li Long had said to Siegfried.

"Uhh, no you didn't," Siegfried replied back.

"**ARRRGGH!** You should have figured that out on your own you dumb tin-man!" Li long had shouted to the German knight. "Unless you want to witness a brutality to that 'armor' of yours, then I suggest you leave at once!"

"But you broke the damn chest, you numbskull! Yet, I don't even know what the hell the contents are, but they're probably shattered to bits by your stupid self now!" Siegfried shouted back. **"Unless you plan on fixing that chest of ours, then you better stop this nonsense fighting right now!"** Siegfried had screamed again.

"Ahh, shut up blondie!" Taki had yelped, taking Li Long's hat and throwing it at Siegfried like a frisbee. She was furious, with her cheeks bloody red. "All of you stop this nonsense right now! You, bald man, interrupted our session! I wasn't even remotely done with him yet! Don't you have any respect for people you maniac!" she screamed to the Chinese man, with Mitsurugi blushing heavily.

"Teh... tehh... t...what?" Li Long questioned the female, drawing back his weapons.

"I will destroy you for attempting to destroy my lover!" Taki shouted, clenching a ball of sand in one hand and one of her swords in the other, giving chase to Li Long. Shocked at the woman's rage, Li Long started to run.

*_Suddenly, the Benny Hill tune plays..._

Mitsurugi and Siegfried watched in embarrassment, with Mitsurugi still blushing.

"Can you believe this? First, my arch rival is now my deepest lover, then Li Long wants to avenge his loss or something, and now this? I need to go back h... home," the samurai said, watching with Siegfried as Taki continued her rage towards Li Long, still attempting to run.

End A/N: Wow, what a chapter. That was wild. I might be starting another fanfic after this one or still in time with this one. See the outcome of the wacky chase, what happens to the chest, and who in the world Siegfried is searching for in the next chapter. R&R please!


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